The Other Man in My Life

Jul 02, 2008

Posted by: John Admin

Uncategorized

So let’s get a few facts down so that we are clear on all of this. I’m a 43 year old, happily married woman. I have a two wonderful children, a husband who loves me to distraction, a full time career and a part time gig as a fantasy author. This all meshes together into a solid upper middle class life, living in a 5 bedroom house in the suburbs of Phoenix, complete with pool, three cats and two desert tortoises.

A good life. A happy life. I would even daresay a blessed life.

But come closer¦. A little closer now. I have something to tell you about me, something that might help you as you muddle through this thing we call life.

I’ve been spending time with another man.

There. I’ve said it. I’ve been seeing someone, and it’s been going on for years. Years, I tell you. Hours and hours I’ve spent in his company, or talking about him with others, or dreaming about what the future might bring. Sure, he started out a little immature, but we all grow, right? It started out so innocently (isn’t that true for these things??). A simple glance, a perusing of what the young man had to offer. Then, I became mesmerized by his charisma and charm. Completely and totally sucked in until I was counting down the days until we could be together again, oblivious to the outside world, wrapped in our own cocoon together. Blissful days¦.

And it wasn’t just him. He came with a whole entourage of people. Not just those closest to him, but a whole gang of folks who I have come to call friends. We come from all walks of life, all stages of our existence, and we are all utterly enthralled.

But oh, you may ask, what has this done to your idyllic family life? How has the entrance of this man into your sphere affected your job, your family, your marriage? Surely the very fabric of your life is stained by this outside intrusion, this distraction¦

Here’s the best part, folks. Are you listening?

My husband knows all about this other man. Yes, you heard me right. He knows all about him, and he actually¦encourages me to spend time with him. Happily sends me off to conferences knowing I will be wallowing in the bonds created with and for this extraordinary young man. Here’s an example of a recent conversation with my Spousal Unit:

Me: Honey? I want to ask you about¦ him.

SU: Him? Who? Our son?

Me: No. Him. You know. Him.

SU: Oh. Yeah. Him. What’s up?

Me: Well, there’s this thing that’s gonna happen this summer. You know, a thing. Where I go away for a week.

SU: That’s right, you’re going away. You’ll be spending time with him. And with all those other people.

Me: Yes. We talked about this, remember?

SU: They’ll all be there, huh? The ones on the computer, who talk to you about him, and then you guys are all laughing together and when I ask about it, you tell me I wouldn’t understand.

Me: Yes. Oh honey, it’s complicated!

SU: I’m sure it is. Really, baby, it’s ok. I have my obsession, why shouldn’t you have yours?

Me: I think your obsession with the Yankees far exceeds my little fling, frankly.

SU: Don’t go there.

Me: So you’ll need to make arrangements with the drama camp to make sure the kids can be dropped off early.

SU: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait a minute¦ Early drop off?

Me: I told you about this.

SU: Was the game on?

Me: Maybe.

SU: I’ll handle it, babe. Don’t worry. The kids will be fine. I’ll be fine. Go have fun with the nerdy people.

Me: Hey. I like those nerdy people! We do understand each other, don’t we?

SU: Yes we do. I’ve got pinstripes and Jeter, you’ve got Leaky and Wizard Rock.

Me: I love you, honey.

SU: I love you too, babe. Can we talk about your obsession with the Quest stuff now?

Me: Don’t go there.

SU: Didn’t think so. Hey, let’s go have some ice cream with the kids. My treat. But we’ll have to leave now because¦.

Me: My LeakyCon Board of Directors meeting starts in half an hour

SU: (at the same time) The game starts at 6:30

Us: (loving sigh and sickly sweet looks)

So there you have it. I have another man in my life, and his name is Harry Potter. He’s brought me joy, happiness, friendship and love. He’s made me a better person. A better wife, mother, friend, and author. I owe him so much, and he’s saved me from having to watch Derek Jeter catching a fly ball on many a summer’s night. So while an obsession can become unhealthy and overrun one’s life¦ a little Harry never hurt anyone. Just¦ keep the balance between the different spheres of your life, juggle the pieces so no one is neglected and everyone will live in harmony. Until one of the cats hacks up a furball on your new carpet, that is.

Be good, ya’ll. Keep the balance. Much love, Lisa





The Leaky Cauldron is not associated with J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros., or any of the individuals or companies associated with producing and publishing Harry Potter books and films.