April 1 is just around the corner—the day we celebrate the birth of our very own mischief makers, the co-kings of the rabble rousers—Fred and George Weasley (the crowd roars with cheers and applause).
To commemorate this most holy of days, our Contest Staff would like to invite you to assist George in coming up with a better ear joke. As you will recall, in Deathly Hallows George was seriously injured by a misplaced sectumsempra curse from Snape. While trying to calm and reassure his most beloved twin as well as the rest of his family and onlookers, George utters what may be one of the worst ear jokes known in the history of mankind (give him a break, he was injured!). To refresh your memories:
“How do you feel, Georgie?” whispered Mrs. Weasley.
George’s fingers groped for the side of his head.
“Saintlike,” he murmured.
“What’s wrong with him?” croaked Fred, looking terrified. “Is his mind affected?”
“Saintlike,” repeated George, opening his eyes and looking up at his brother. “You see…I’m holy. Holey, Fred, geddit?” (Deathly Hallows, Scholastic Hardcover Edition, p. 74)
Rules for Entrants:*
• Write an ear joke for George that is no longer than 50 words.
• There is a strict PG-13 rating for the jokes.
• There is a limit of three ear jokes per person. All work must be original.
• All decisions by the judges are final
• Anyone over the age of 13 can enter the contest, including staff members who are not involved in the judging process.
• All submissions must be e-mailed to firstname.lastname@example.org with the subject line as "Ear Jokes" by March 25, 2008 at 11:59 pm (EST). Please copy-paste the joke(s) into the body of the e-mail and include a name to be used for authorship (real name or Leaky Lounge).
• Please refer to our FAQ if you are not sure of something.
• If you have any questions not answered on the FAQ, or would like to discuss this Contest, please come to the Contest Corner forum of The Leaky Lounge. Rumor has it Gred and Forge may be making the occasional appearance to personally answer any questions you may have regarding their contest (as you know from some of their experiments, they like to take a more "hands on" approach).
• Look for winners to be announced on April 1, 2008!
*Fred and George would never abide by the rules, so for this one contest, we will turn a blind eye to any rule breaking, other than the PG-13 and must be 13 to enter restrictions (Hey, we don’t want to be handcuffed and hauled off to Azkaban).
1st Place - Amber
“‘Eh? What’s that you say?” George asked, cupping the hole where his ear had been.
“I SAID, WHERE’S HARRY?” Ron bellowed as his mother walked in.
George looked confused..
“Oh, no, it’s not just your ear that you lost. Your hearing’s gone, too!” Molly fretted.
“Oh, don’t worry, mum,” George said immediately. “The hearing loss is only selective.”
2nd Place - MalfoyDiva
Fred: You okay George?
George: I'm great! I'm going to be an amazing Quidditch player now!
Fred: Why is that?
George: Less wind resistance!
3rd Place - MalfoyDiva
Fred: Sorry you lost your ear mate.
George: Well you know what they say, 'Ear today gone Tomorrow'!
1st Place - Nobodey
Weasleys Wizard Wheezes An extendable ear is better than no ear at all!
2nd Place – Nobodey
Weasleys Wizard Wheezes! Now 25 percent less earwax!
3rd Place - Jukilum
"No more 'in one ear and out the other'!"