February 03, 2010, 01:41 PM
This past week dumped a whole load of worries on my shoulders. We are waiting with baited breath until March, when my youngest son is scheduled for an endoscopy, to find out if he needs a pretty serious surgery, or has to wear a prosthetic device in his mouth for the rest of his life. Not a pretty thing to face, to be sure.
In this time I've found myself in an unusual position. Usually extroverted and full of energy, I'm instead withdrawn inside myself hiding my rolling emotions from my son who is, of course, terrified. Always one to face problems head on and resolve them myself I'm finding the reality of facing a problem that I can't fix to be very stressful. So what does an extrovert do when they find themselves introverted? Well, I choose to craft.
I am working to finish a twin sized quilt for my son's bed, and find that the quiet hum of the sewing machine motor as I piece squares together soothes my soul much like chicken soup helps ease the aches of a head cold. Standing at the ironing board pressing the quilt seams I feel the warmth of the iron seep into my terrified heart and loosen the knot that seems to have set up residence there. The scent of the heated cotton fabric is further proof that, though change is charging at us full steam ahead, there is comfort in things that never change, that remain constant. I'm almost done with the quilt top, now. So close that today was spent partaking in some retail therapy to get the batting, quilting thread, and looking for the perfect backing fabric. I haven't found it yet, but just getting out of the house and being able to concentrate on something other than what my son is going to have to go through soon was a great help.
In a couple of weeks, or less, my son's quilt will be complete. He'll snuggle under it at night no matter what path the fast-approaching future chooses for him. Me? I'll have the knowledge that my love for him, my worry for him, and my hopes for him are as woven into that quilt as the stitches themselves, and that one little quilt did more for me than I could ever hope to do for it.
'Til we meet again!
Crafty Witch Jenn (a.k.a. SuperJenn)